Tuesday, October 14, 2014

I Suck at Making Crispy Treats

There is just no politically correct way of telling you this so I am being blunt- I suck at making crispy treats. We've all seen the commercials that depict a mom sitting with her children- a warm kitchen, they're all happy and giggly and they are shaping their treats into perfect little forms. The mom snuggles her children and they are all like "I'm gonna make a star!" and the mom is like "Well I'm going to make a hat!" So, SO not real life.

You know what's real life? That nasty, sticky web of marshmallow that begins at sticky mixture, leads to the spoon, then the place that you tried to form something then to your hair. Your kitchen counter turns into one gooey ledge of slippery, hard to clean, going to begin throwing crap kind of a place. Kind of like THIS-

Yikes!!!! So how, why, where?...Gah!!!!! Is there some factory secret on how people actually form these goodies without having to get a wallpaper scraper to remove all of it? Inquiring minds want to know. (Well, I do at least). I tried- I had this vision inside of my head of what I wanted to create to share with all of you as an easy Halloween treat. That all went out the window. My patience is kaput!

However, I think it's still important to share my disasters too. Why? Because in the midst of me having a mini breakdown and almost being in tears because there is actually no such thing as a Halloween muffin (picture to follow), my kids taught me a lesson- they taught me to lighten up. Because during the time that we parents are trying to be so perfect, our children are just waiting in the other room, not caring what it looks like or if it's pretty. My children just want to hear "Try this" and it's like vultures attacking their prey.

Example- these were my (better) treats that survived-

I know, you are looking at them trying to figure out what they are and if they are even any different. I getcha' and I'm not offended in the least. They are supposed to be Halloween muffins and Halloween wreaths...gosh, is there even such a thing?! (Recipe Tip: I used Freedom Foods Maple Crunch Cereal and Starburst Candy Corn)

I pride myself on trying to take pretty pictures and these, well, they aren't the best but they aren't the worst as far as colors go but the treats...nah! However, they do taste really good and that is a plus with my kids. Besides, while all of the other kids in school all have the same old Halloween treats left over, they will be eyeing up my children's colorful treats asking "Hey, what is that?!" And soon, all of them will be going home, asking their parents to make them these tasty, colorful blobs of goodness and wondering why they had never had them before. Parents from all over the world will contact me, Nutrimom, asking me for this secret recipe that everyone keeps talking about but not before Dr. Oz's producers call me up to say "We must know, Nutrimom, what made you think of this unique way of portraying Halloween for your children?"

Well, not quite, I know....perhaps the sugar from the taste-testing has kicked in but a girl can dream, right?

Now, if you really want a laugh, I am also going to share the items that did not turn out at all (but were still devoured)

 I did manage to make a few cute critters (well, I think they are cute) and they are easy! Remember that post I wrote about my bubbled-over cupcakes? (Psst! Here) Well, I defrosted those saved topless cupcakes and reformed them into blobby monsters. The best part is that it doesn't matter if they start to unmold or fall apart, just keep adding melted chocolate and create yourself a creepy yet edible Halloween monster.

(Recipe Tip: I used Enjoy Life Foods chocolate chips and a combination of broken Brothers-All-Natural Fruit Clusters and Fruit Crisps for the extra body parts).

So to all of my fellow parents out there (food allergic and otherwise), I am hear to remind you that whatever you do, your children will like it. Not all creations must be picture-perfect and not all treats must look like they were featured in the latest issue of Better Homes & Gardens. Allow yourself to cook outside of the lines too~


  1. I love the monsters! Thank you: now I know what to do with my own culinary failures, at least in the aesthetic department. And it's so good to know I'm not the only one who can't make a crispy treat. Believe me, yours look much better than mine. But most of the time, if you close your eyes and try the gooey mess, it does taste good.

    1. Thanks Kathy! I appreciate your thoughts and I do always try to stay true to what actually happens in every day life :) Thank you for being a part of what I do ~

  2. I love these! They turned out pretty amazingly in your kid's eyes I am sure.

    And look at the great example you're setting for them about embracing imperfection and celebrating failure ��
    (that's quite trendy right now, you know)

    I can't even tell you if I can make crispy treats anymore. Maybe I'll make some with my son monster bites this weekend with him (because then at least I can shift the blame to him for how they turn out...and we can celebrate his failure)

    1. As long as they taste good, right? :) Especially when you learn to cook with food allergies, you need to be ready for some bad recipes sometimes